The Courage to Be Disliked

Mon, 28 Oct 2024 00:00:00 +0000

Nothing in your history compels your present. That is the jolt at the center of this book, which lays out Adlerian psychology as a running argument between a stubborn philosopher and a skeptical young man. Most therapy, and Freud above all, works backward: it treats your unhappiness as an effect of past causes — childhood wounds, trauma, formative injuries that supposedly made you who you are. Adler flips the direction. He says we’re driven by purpose, not history, choosing goals in the present and then recruiting the past as evidence for them. If you’re convinced a hard childhood made you anxious, you have the arrow backward: you settled on anxiety, unconsciously, because it serves some goal, and the past is just the alibi.

Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga on SummaryShelf

The Courage to Be Disliked